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Old June 05, 2015, 10:46 PM
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AngelicaDeAlquezar AngelicaDeAlquezar is offline
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Location: Mexico City
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Good work.

You have mixed many conjugations. If you're using the imperative for "tú" in the first sentences, then you have to conjugate the same all through your text. (If you learnt "vos" or "usted", you also must stick to one person and conjugate accordingly.)

You may find useful this thread on the differences between "por" and "para.

Here are some hints and suggestions for improving your text.

Quote:
Hola me llamo Haley, voy a hacerlos (Is this a typo or are we missing your DO here?) encurtidos para los rollitos de venduras (Check your vocabulary). Primero deba (Check conjugation) tener los pepinos, la cebolla *** (Punctuation sign missing here) jalapeño claro, y completamente lavarlas (Check conjugation agreement). No tenes (Check conjugation) las venduras sucio (Check gender agreement). Después añade no un poco, pero mucho la sal (This is unclear, can you reword?), minuciosamente las venduras. El agua necesita salirse (This use of the verb "salir" is unclear, what do you mean?) para (You're saying that the purpose of your action is twenty minutes. That doesn't make sense; check your vocabulary) viente minutos y enjuaga. No saces (Check conjugation) las *** (Something is missing here) después de diez minutos. Dejalos (If you're not using Argentine conjugation, you need to insert a written accent here) aparte, hace (Check conjugation) la salmuera. (I'm just putting a bunch of things in a pot so i took it out). Luego, hiervala (Check conjugation) hasta (This preposition needs a destination, but there is none in your sentence; get rid of it) en fuego lento, y apaga la estufa. Entonces, pon los pepinos en una olla, saca las (You need to correct the gender agreement and the way it works with the verb) de la salmuera *** (Punctuation) hierva (Conjugation) *** (Preposition missing) fuego lento nuevo (We can't have a new fire; check your vocabulary). No deje (Conjugation) los pepinos hierve para mucho tiempo (Try rewording; check conjugation and the note about "para"). Sacalos (Check accents) rapidamente (Accent missing). Por fin (We prefer this expression to say that something happened "at last", as if we were relieved that something happened; try another way to say "finally"), pon los (OD must be in the same word with the verb) en un envase y deja enfriar, (avoid so many "y" or try a longer pause inserting a different punctuation) y los encurtidos estan (Accent) terminado (Gender agreement).
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