If you think that Latin is unsuitable for modern, everyday use, I suggest that you read the book entitled X-TREME LATIN by HENRICUS BARBATUS (Henry Beard) All the Latin you need to survive in the the XXI century.
ISBN 0-7553-1296-1
www.madaboutbooka.com
Here is a quote from the chapter:
Romuli Remique Iocularum
Romulus-
Quem ob rem pullus sacer viam Appiam transivit?
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Why did the sacred chicken cross the Appian way?
Remus-
Nescio,Eum evisceremus ut, extane ostensura sint illius infausti facti causam, comperiamus!
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I do not know. Let us cut it open to see if the entrails provide an explanation of its inauspicious behaviour!