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Your post was moved to this forum so that others can
help you arrive at the correct translation on your own. Read the hints I've provided below and ask questions, if necessary, before reposting your narrative. (There's no reason to write your narrative in bold.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by fontana
hello guys!
I really need your help ... I wrote this text and (I) would like to know my mistakes...
"I believe in the magic of the (unnecessary) music and in their (check agreement) wonderful effect of opening up hearts like flowers.
I believe in the rapture of the (unnecessary) music and in the (unnecessary) songs that they (unnecessary) shoot (missing a preposition) you (need punctuation here) not to hurt (alternate: wound) you, (missing a conjunction here - replaces 'only') only to choose you (alternate: single you out) and then to illuminate you.
I believe in the (unnecessary) songs that they (unnecessary) can stop the hit (must be a noun, and there is a better word to use) in time and to the time at one hit (the Spanish is idiomatic - find an equivalent English phrase).
I believe in the (unnecessary) songs that they (unnecessary) can move us away (alternate: distance us) from the (unnecessary) sadness and from (unnecessary) their (check agreement) damned company, the (unnecessary) pain.
I also believe that a single song was (incorrect tense) enough to heal us or to ill us ('make us ill' should be used), to destroy us or to save us...
This is the story of a fragmented heart or, probably (wrong word), a story of our fragmented hearts..."
and just in case, this is the original text in my native language. Maybe this will help someone who speaks Spanish to better understand what I meant.
"Creo en la magia de la musica y en su maravilloso efecto de abrir los corazones como flores. Creo en el rapto de la musica y en las canciones que te disparan para no herirte, solo para elegirte y despues, iluminarte. Creo en las canciones que detienen el golpe a tiempo y al tiempo de golpe. Creo en las canciones que pueden alejarnos de la tristeza y de su maldita compañia, el dolor. Creo tambien que una sola cancion bastara para sanarnos o para enfermarnos, para destruirnos o para salvarnos...
Esta es la historia de un corazon fragmentado o quizas, la historia de nuestros corazones fragmentados..."
Well, I hope to get some help from you. Thank you so much for being here!
Cheers!
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P.D. Some of your errors came from the fact that the
original 'poem' had a plural subject instead of the singular subject 'music'.
