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Old September 20, 2010, 08:47 PM
Feliz Feliz is offline
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Requesting a Critique....



I'd like to get a critique of this note to someone. I have been learning mostly from Rosetta. Gracias.



¡Hola Maria! ¿Cómo estás hoy? Estoy escribiendo en mi computadora portátil en español esta mañana. Mi español es muy malo, lo sé, pero estoy estudiando y aprendiendo más cada d*a. Mi esposo está hablando en el teléfono y él dice ¡Hola! Mi nietos están a escuela. Nuestros perros están durmiendo debajo de mesa en el cocina. Los caballos están comiendo los flores en el jard*n otra vez. Y mi carro es roto y en el garaje. Mi madre es en el hospital pero ella está mucho mucho mejor ahora. Eso es todo por ahora. Por favor escribe pronto. Tiene una bien d*a. Adiós.

Feliz
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  #2  
Old September 21, 2010, 02:21 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Feliz View Post


I'd like to get a critique of this note to someone. I have been learning mostly from Rosetta. Gracias.



¡Hola Maria! ¿Cómo estás hoy? Estoy escribiendo en mi computadora portátil (1) en español esta mañana. Mi español es muy malo, lo sé, pero estoy estudiando y aprendiendo más cada d*a. Mi esposo está hablando en el por teléfono y él dice ¡Hola! Mi nietos están a en la escuela. Nuestros perros están durmiendo debajo de mesa en el de la cocina. Los caballos están comiendo los flores en el jard*n otra vez. Y mi carro es roto y en el garaje. Mi madre es en el hospital pero ella está mucho mucho mejor ahora. Eso es todo por ahora. Por favor escribe pronto. Tiene una bien d*a Que tengas un buen d*a. Adiós.

Feliz
(1) Puedes decir "portátil", sin la palabra computadora.

Your Spanish is not so bad.

Eso s*, la letra un poco pequeña y yo no tengo mucha agudez visual.
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Old September 21, 2010, 02:34 AM
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seems good, a little "direct translation" but it's clear.
some changes

¡Hola Maria! ¿Cómo estás hoy? Estoy escribiendo en mi computadora portátil en español esta mañana. (No need to say "computadora". writing in a "portátil" must be a computer...) Mi español es muy malo, lo sé, pero estoy estudiando y aprendiendo más cada d*a. Mi esposo está hablando por el teléfono y él te dice ¡Hola! Mi nietos están a en la escuela. Nuestros perros están durmiendo debajo de mesa en el la cocina. Los caballos están comiendose las flores en del jard*n otra vez. Y mi carro es roto y en el garaje. (I assume here "garage" is at home) Mi madre es en el hospital, pero ella está mucho mucho mejor ahora. Eso es todo por ahora. Por favor escribe pronto. Tiene una bien d*a. Que tengas un buen d*a. Adiós.


saludos

PD: "Hablar en el teléfono" / "hablar por el teléfono". I always use the last une. I don't know if in other countries it's more common to say the first one.

PDII ops, irma already answered..... some stylistic changes
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Last edited by sosia; September 21, 2010 at 02:37 AM.
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Old September 21, 2010, 02:38 AM
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Don't worry, de lunes a martes... (tampoco ve*a mucho, soy cegata )
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Old September 21, 2010, 11:26 AM
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mi nietos s/b mis nietos
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Old September 21, 2010, 12:53 PM
Feliz Feliz is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by irmamar View Post
(1) Puedes decir "portátil", sin la palabra computadora.
Gracias Irmamar. That is good to know. Can I do the same for computadora sobremesa or ordenador sobremesa? I mean just use: sobremesa?

Muchas gracias, Irmamar. Thank you for pointing out all the mistakes. I have gone over every one and taken note. I need to edit a lot better. I can see that.

From this point on, I'm going to combine the posts from both you and Sosia. I hope that you don't mind. Your corrections are so similar. I thank you both for your scrutiny, I really appreciate it. :>)




Quote:
Originally Posted by sosia View Post
seems good, a little "direct translation" but it's clear.
some changes
Sosia, I am not clear about what you mean by "direct translation." Are my sentences awkward?

Mi esposo está hablando por el teléfono

My mistake, we say hablando por el teléfono or hablar por el teléfono as well.

y él te dice ¡Hola!

Irmamar y Sosia, I've got to stop using personal pronouns with this type of sentence structure. I'm just becoming acquainted with reflexive and direct object pronouns so I hope to have this under control soon. Thanks for bringing this to my attention.

Mis nietos están a en la escuela.

Irmamar o Sosia: Yes, the grandchildren are "in" the school, not "at" the school. If they were away at college, would a escuela be appropriate?

Los caballos están comiendose las flores en del jard*n otra vez.

Sosia: Another editing mistake of mine: las flores. But the comiendose is in a future lesson plan that I am looking forward to understanding. I even like the way that it sounds already: "comiendose." Thanks.

Y mi carro es roto y en el garaje. (I assume here "garage" is at home)

Sosia: Another editing mistake: está. Yes, you assumed right, the garage is at home. If it were not, would garaje still be used and in the same manner? Mi madre es en el hospital, pero ella está mucho mucho mejor ahora.

Eso es todo por ahora. Por favor escribe pronto. Tiene una bien d*a. Que tengas un buen d*a. Adiós.

Another future lesson plan that I am looking forward to understanding--the future tenses. But I can already understand from your pointing it out here that Que tengas means "You have" (sometime in the future). And since d*a is a masculine noun, una and buena become un and buen instead. Very enlightening.

Muchas gracias, Irmamar and Sosia.





Quote:
Originally Posted by Rusty View Post
mi nietos s/b mis nietos
Thank you for pointing this out to me. Coincidentally, this morning I awoke saying to myself: "and the mi nientos should have been mis nientos." We must be on the same wavelength

Last edited by AngelicaDeAlquezar; September 21, 2010 at 01:46 PM. Reason: Fixed quotes :)
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Old September 21, 2010, 03:18 PM
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Gracias Irmamar. That is good to know. Can I do the same for computadora sobremesa or ordenador sobremesa? I mean just use: sobremesa?
No, this time is the other way. You can use ordenador ó computadora and not sobremesa. Some time ago (10 years) all computers where "de sobremesa". Spanish......
Are my sentences awkward?
Not really, only two, but seems direct translations.
Mi esposo está hablando en el teléfono y él dice ¡Hola!
My husband it's at the phone and says ¡Hi!
usual: Mi marido está hablando por teléfono, te manda un saludo (he greets you, he send you a greeting)
Y mi carro es roto y en el garaje. And my car is broken and at the garage.
usual: Y mi coche está roto en el garaje.
the grandchildren are "in" the school, not "at" the school. If they were away at college, would a escuela be appropriate?
No, estar*an en la guarder*a (Kindergarten), en el colegio (school) ó en la universidad (at the university)
If it were not, would garaje still be used and in the same manner? Garage it's usually at home, but in a broader meaning can be a repairing place (a mechanic, "un taller de reparación"): Since it's broken, can be both.
Quote:
RAE: garaje.
(Del fr. garage).
1. m. Local destinado a guardar automóviles.
2. m. Taller de reparación de veh*culos.
3. m. P. Rico. gasolinera (‖ establecimiento donde se vende gasolina).
if you say "Mi coche está limpio en el garaje" it's clear it's at home.
If you say "Mi coche está roto y lo he llevado al garaje/taller" it's not at home.

saludos
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Old September 21, 2010, 06:00 PM
Feliz Feliz is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sosia View Post
Gracias Irmamar. That is good to know. Can I do the same for computadora sobremesa or ordenador sobremesa? I mean just use: sobremesa?
No, this time is the other way. You can use ordenador ó computadora and not sobremesa. Some time ago (10 years) all computers where "de sobremesa". Spanish......
Are my sentences awkward?
Not really, only two, but seems direct translations.
Mi esposo está hablando en el teléfono y él dice ¡Hola!
My husband it's at the phone and says ¡Hi!
usual: Mi marido está hablando por teléfono, te manda un saludo (he greets you, he send you a greeting)
Y mi carro es roto y en el garaje. And my car is broken and at the garage.
usual: Y mi coche está roto en el garaje.
the grandchildren are "in" the school, not "at" the school. If they were away at college, would a escuela be appropriate?
No, estar*an en la guarder*a (Kindergarten), en el colegio (school) ó en la universidad (at the university)
If it were not, would garaje still be used and in the same manner? Garage it's usually at home, but in a broader meaning can be a repairing place (a mechanic, "un taller de reparación"): Since it's broken, can be both.

if you say "Mi coche está limpio en el garaje" it's clear it's at home.
If you say "Mi coche está roto y lo he llevado al garaje/taller" it's not at home.

saludos
Sosia


Thank you for more detailed information. I don't believe that I have missed anything. If I have, please let me know. Muchas gracias.


Is this correct? A laptop computer in Spanish is portátil. A desktop computer in Spanish is computador, computadora, or ordenador because in the beginning there was only the desktop type of computer. I think what was confusing me is that sobremesa means the top-of-the-desk and therefore a desktop of sorts. Isn't that funny? So, if I say computador sobremesa or computadora sobremesa or ordenador sobremesa I am being redundant. I'm saying desk top (desktop) computer the way that Yo estoy in Yo estoy muy bien. is "sometimes" redundant and unnecessary. To think that I almost didn't ask this question. Hmm.


From my experience: Mi esposo hablando está por la telefóno. is Mexican Spanish. Mi marido hablando está por la telefóno is Latin American Spanish. I like to learn both whenever I can. Other word differences that come to mind are carro/coche, niño/chico, niña/chica.


I will memorize and use te manda un saludo to mean "he sends you a greeting" instead of y dice ¡Hola! I am looking forward to understanding the te part of this sentence fragment when I study the many other categories of pronouns that exist in Spanish grammar. :>)


I'm going to revise the sentence in the original paragraph about the car to read this way. Y mi carro está en nuestro garaje--roto. Until I understand more completely what you have written about the different types of garages.


I now understand: en la guarder*a; en el colegio; en la universidad. I won't be using the "at school" again.



¡Hola Maria! ¿Cómo estás hoy? Estoy escribiendo sobre mi portátil en español esta mañana. Mi español es muy malo, lo sé, pero estoy estudiando y aprendiendo más cada d*a. Mi marido está hablando por el teléfono y te manda un saludo. Mis nietos están en la escuela. Nuestros perros están durmiendo debajo de la mesa en nuestro cocina. Los caballos están comiendose las flores en del jard*n otra vez. Y mi carro es en nuestro garaje--roto. Mi madre es en el hospital pero ella está mucho mucho mejor ahora. Eso es todo por ahora. Por favor escribe pronto. Que tengas un bien d*a. Adiós.


I don't know what my signature is going to be yet, but after this, I'm thinking about:
¡Levántate!--otra vez What a wonderful workout. Thank you very much. I would have never figured all of this out by myself.

Last edited by Rusty; September 21, 2010 at 08:58 PM. Reason: Increased font size
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Old September 21, 2010, 10:56 PM
Feliz Feliz is offline
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Hello Irmamar, Sosia, and Rusty. I have just learned how to upload an .mp3 file--I hope! If you hear this, please give me your opinion. I am reading words that we developed in this tread over the past 24 hours. I can speak them naturally, but they do sound different when they're "read" from a page. Thanks.
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Reading a letter to Maria in Spanish.mp3 (388.3 KB, 152 views)  
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Old September 21, 2010, 11:50 PM
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Feliz, Spanish vowels and consonants seldom sound like the English ones, so you may want to focus on that. Then, try blending the words together, just like you do when speaking English.

Don't at all get discouraged. You're doing great for how long you've been studying!!!

I hope a native speaker will record their rendition of your letter.
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