Puns

[CrOtALiTo]

If already you understood the game, then please you explain me please.

[gandalf]

El zoológico se incendió ayer, sospechan de las llamas.

[Elaina]

Cute!

[Villa]

¿Por qué llama un casino? Porque casi no tienes la posibilidad de ganar.

[Rusty]

No es un juego, Jorge. Son bromas de doble sentido (juegos de palabras).


Here are some more:

As you know, Mahatma Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super-callused, fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

Two atoms were jogging downtown and happened to run into each other as they both rounded the same corner. Brushing each other off after the mishap, the one asks the other, "Are you alright?" "No, I think I lost an electron." "Oh! Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm positive."

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. "How much do I owe?" he asked when he's finished it. The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

A mushroom walks into a club and slides up to the bar. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve mushrooms here." "Why not? I'm a fun guy!"

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. They didn't have much of a ceremony, but the reception was excellent.

Two cannibals are eating a clown that stumbled into their village by mistake. The one says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"

A person interested in winning the grand prize at a joke contest submitted ten puns in hopes that at least one of the puns would make the judges laugh. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

[CrOtALiTo]

Escrito originalmente por Rusty

No es un juego, Jorge. Son bromas de doble sentido (juegos de palabras).


Here are some more:

As you know, Mahatma Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super-callused, fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

Two atoms were jogging downtown and happened to run into each other as they both rounded the same corner. Brushing each other off after the mishap, the one asks the other, "Are you alright?" "No, I think I lost an electron." "Oh! Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm positive."

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. "How much do I owe?" he asked when he's finished it. The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

A mushroom walks into a club and slides up to the bar. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve mushrooms here." "Why not? I'm a fun guy!"

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. They didn't have much of a ceremony, but the reception was excellent.

Two cannibals are eating a clown that stumbled into their village by mistake. The one says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"

A person interested in winning the grand prize at a joke contest submitted ten puns in hopes that at least one of the puns would make the judges laugh. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

I'm surprised for long explanation.
But I believe that the term joke in double sense isn't the mine.

Thank you anyhow.

[Tarential]

I don't know if this exactly qualifies as a pun, but it is similar in style. A classic Mitch Hedberg line:
"I haven't slept for a week... because that would be too long."

Also one that popped into my head from reading one of Jessica's:
"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies are freakin' annoying."

[JPablo]

A toothless termite comes into a bar, "is the bar tender here?"

[AngelicaDeAlquezar]

@Rusty:

@JPablo: Ese último es muy tierno.


-- Estaba lloviendo.
-- ¿A quién estabas tú viendo?


-- ¿Usted, no nada nada?
-- Es que no traje traje, porque me lo guarda el guarda.


-- ¿Usted cómo come?
-- ¿Que cómo como? Como como como.


-- Al fakir lo mordió la víbora.
-- ¿Cobra?
-- No, gratis.


Y éste es de Xavier Villaurrutia (México, 1903-1950):
Y mi voz que madura
y mi voz quemadura
y mi bosque madura
y mi voz quema dura.
-- De Nocturno en que Nada se Oye.

[Perikles]

Escrito originalmente por AngelicaDeAlquezar

Al fakir lo mordió la víbora.
-- ¿Cobra?
-- No, gratis.

Would you always use la víbora for a snake in general? The joke doesn't work if it's more specific.