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A poem about kiwis (Spanish homework)

 

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  #1  
Old February 01, 2010, 10:36 PM
notoman notoman is offline
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A poem about kiwis (Spanish homework)

We need to write a poem about a fruit or vegetable for Spanish in the style of Pablo Neruda. I need help with some of the grammar. I am hoping that I didn't misuse any of the words (It can be tricky trying to look things up in a dictionary!). Thank you so much! Here is what I have right now:


El kiwi.
Café y verde,
Fruta favorita mía.
Demasiado feo
Desde fuera
Con piel como
Un chimpancé.
El color de café.
Cuando pienso
Del kiwi otra
Vez, es un poco
Más lindo.
El piel es rizado
Como un oso de
Pelucha.

Para ver
La beldad verdadera,
Es necesaria
Cortar en
Rodajas.
El interno de lo
Es una corazón
Verde y dulce.
Una sorpresa
Para mi lengua.
Es como mojado
Terciopelo.
La tienda
No tiene kiwis
En el oscuro
Del invierno
Y me esperaba
Encontrar
Un sabor
Como este frutita
Me inspira.
Trato uvas,
Mañanas, y
Pomegranates pero
No hay una fruta
Tan deliciosa
Como el kiwi.
Deseo comprar
Un kiwi
En Nueva Zelanda.
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  #2  
Old February 02, 2010, 01:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by notoman View Post
We need to write a poem about a fruit or vegetable for Spanish in the style of Pablo Neruda. I need help with some of the grammar. I am hoping that I didn't misuse any of the words (It can be tricky trying to look things up in a dictionary!). Thank you so much! Here is what I have right now:


El kiwi.
Café y verde,
Fruta favorita mía.
Demasiado feo
Desde fuera
Con piel como
Un chimpancé.
El color de café.
Cuando pienso
Del kiwi otra en el kiwi otra
Vez, es un poco
Más lindo.
El piel es rizado tiene la piel rizada
Como un oso de
Pelucha.peluche

Para ver
La beldad verdadera, (belleza mejor que beldad, que es un poco anticuado y se suele aplicar a la mujer)
Es necesaria necesario
Cortarlo en
Rodajas.
El interno de lo Su interior
Es una corazón es un corazón
Verde y dulce.
Una sorpresa
Para mi lengua.
Es como mojado húmedo
Terciopelo.
La tienda
No tiene kiwis
En el oscuro
Del invierno
Y me esperaba
Encontrar
Un sabor
Como este frutita
Me inspira.
Trato uvas, intento con uvas
Mañanas, y ¿manzanas?
Pomegranates pero No sé qué son pomegranates
No hay una fruta
Tan deliciosa
Como el kiwi.
Deseo comprar
Un kiwi
En Nueva Zelanda.
Estás hecho un poeta

En la poesía en español no se suele utilizar, como en la inglesa, el inicio de cada verso en mayúsculas. Por lo que yo comenzaría cada verso con minúscula (excepto cuando gramaticalmente sea necesaria la mayúscula, como al principio del poema o después de un punto).
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  #3  
Old February 02, 2010, 02:44 AM
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Ambarina Ambarina is offline
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pomegranate: granada
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"Desiderata" - ...be gentle with yourself.You are a child of this universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.
...sé amable contigo mismo. Eres una criatura de este universo al igual que los árboles y las estrellas; tienes derecho a estar aquí.
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  #4  
Old February 02, 2010, 03:05 AM
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Perikles Perikles is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ambarina View Post
pomegranate: granada
Latin pomum fruit, later apple, + (malum) granatum = apple having many seeds

By the way, you ought to call them Kiwi Fruits, to distinguish between them and the bird, which is what I thought the thread was about. I remember them being called Chinese gooseberries.

Last edited by Perikles; February 02, 2010 at 03:54 AM.
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  #5  
Old February 02, 2010, 04:07 AM
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Ambarina Ambarina is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Perikles View Post
Latin pomum fruit, later apple, + (malum) granatum = apple having many seeds

By the way, you ought to call them Kiwi Fruits, to distinguish between them and the bird, which is what I thought the thread was about. I remember them being called Chinese gooseberries.
Slight digression here.
I always thought it strange that the Spanish and the Portuguese use manzana and maça for apple, when most other "latinate" languages use the pomum root: pomme, poma, pom, pomo...
__________________
"Desiderata" - ...be gentle with yourself.You are a child of this universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.
...sé amable contigo mismo. Eres una criatura de este universo al igual que los árboles y las estrellas; tienes derecho a estar aquí.
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  #6  
Old February 02, 2010, 04:15 AM
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irmamar irmamar is offline
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A new word. Thanks
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  #7  
Old February 02, 2010, 05:31 AM
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Perikles Perikles is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ambarina View Post
Slight digression here.
I always thought it strange that the Spanish and the Portuguese use manzana and maça for apple, when most other "latinate" languages use the pomum root: pomme, poma, pom, pomo...
I think that is because the Spanish is taken from older Vulgar Latin, when the word for an apple was malum, from which a kind of apple mala matiana hence mattiana hence manzana. Later, Latin pomum took on the meaning, and other languages took words from a later date. This happens with lots of Latin words, e.g. mesa - tabla
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  #8  
Old February 02, 2010, 07:44 AM
notoman notoman is offline
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¡Gracias por todo!

Quote:
Originally Posted by irmamar View Post
Estás hecho un poeta

En la poesía en español no se suele utilizar, como en la inglesa, el inicio de cada verso en mayúsculas. Por lo que yo comenzaría cada verso con minúscula (excepto cuando gramaticalmente sea necesaria la mayúscula, como al principio del poema o después de un punto).
Thank you for this! I saw that Neruda didn't capitalize every line of his poems, but I thought it was a style thing—like when e.e. cummings doesn't capitalize his name. I know *some* of the differences between capitalization rules in English and Spanish ... English, for example capitalizes all of the words in a title (except short words like for, and, of, etc.) where Spanish only capitalizes the first word (and proper nouns). It took me a long time to remember to capitalize Ud. and Uds.!

¡Sí! I meant manzanas not mañanas. My computer has an autocorrect set to English, but it knows the word mañana so it changed it.

I will change it say kiwi fruit. ¿El fruto del kiwi? I don't know if I need to make it masculine. In the Ave María, we say "el fruto de tu veintre, Jesús," but I don't know if the same structure carries over here. When I refer to it later in the poem, should I use frutito?

Again, thank you so much! It means the world to me.
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  #9  
Old February 02, 2010, 11:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by notoman View Post
¡Gracias por todo!



Thank you for this! I saw that Neruda didn't capitalize every line of his poems, but I thought it was a style thing—like when e.e. cummings doesn't capitalize his name. I know *some* of the differences between capitalization rules in English and Spanish ... English, for example capitalizes all of the words in a title (except short words like for, and, of, etc.) where Spanish only capitalizes the first word (and proper nouns). It took me a long time to remember to capitalize Ud. and Uds.!

¡Sí! I meant manzanas not mañanas. My computer has an autocorrect set to English, but it knows the word mañana so it changed it.

I will change it say kiwi fruit. ¿El fruto del kiwi? I don't know if I need to make it masculine. In the Ave María, we say "el fruto de tu veintre, Jesús," but I don't know if the same structure carries over here. When I refer to it later in the poem, should I use frutito?

Again, thank you so much! It means the world to me.
In Spanish you can keep it as straight "kiwi". I think Perikles was thinking in English. There's not much chance of a Spaniard associating "kiwi" with anything other than the fruit at first glance. In any case it would be, like you say, "el fruto del kiwi"
Later in the poem it would be "una frutita".
__________________
"Desiderata" - ...be gentle with yourself.You are a child of this universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.
...sé amable contigo mismo. Eres una criatura de este universo al igual que los árboles y las estrellas; tienes derecho a estar aquí.
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  #10  
Old February 02, 2010, 11:35 AM
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irmamar irmamar is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Perikles View Post
I think that is because the Spanish is taken from older Vulgar Latin, when the word for an apple was malum, from which a kind of apple mala matiana hence mattiana hence manzana. Later, Latin pomum took on the meaning, and other languages took words from a later date. This happens with lots of Latin words, e.g. mesa - tabla
"Mela" in Italian
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