Can someone check my Spanish homework

[H0la456]

First off, hello and thanks for viewing my thread (even more thanks if you help)


For my Spanish class we have to write two, 25 word pages for each tense we've learned and each is about ourselves, a family member, or a friend. It's a decent amount of points so I thought I'd double check here. I lose a point for every accent missed too. I don't think I need help on present so I'll leave it out.

Also, we can have more than one tense in our stories but we must underline the verbal form required on the page. The ones I think fit the tense I will bold.

Past Tense (Preterit):

1). Cuando (<=accent?) mi bisabuelo llegó a Estados Unidos desde Croacia y se perdío en el camio a Chicago porque él no sabía Inglés. Durante la noche, mi bisabuelo le preguntó un agricultor para ayuda y recibió un disparo en el pierna porque él no sabía que el agricultor le decía a salir.
2). En el verano de quinto grado, traté una rampa con mi bicicleta y me caí desde my bicicleta y raspé el rodillo y el pie.

1). When my great-grandpa came to the United States from Croatia and got lost on the way to Chicago from Ellis island because he didn't know any English. During the night, my great grandfather asked a farmer for help and was shot in the leg because he didn't know the farmer was telling him to leave.
2.) In the summer of 5th grade, I tried to jump a ramp with my bike and I fell from my bike and scraped my knee and foot.
================================================== ======
Imperfect:
1.) Mi perro era muy pequeño cuando mi familia y yo recibíamos ella desde un granja en el pueblo de (town name). Originalmente, ella se sentía muy triste cuando llevabamos desde su casa.
2.) Cuando era pequeño, yo jugaba en el parque por muchas horas. Subía muchos árboles en el parque. Yo bebía mucho leche y agua porque no me gustaba los refrescos

1.) My dog was very small when my family and I received her from a farm en the town of (town name). Originally, she was very sad when she left from her home.
2.) When I was younger I played in the park for many hours. I climbed many trees in the park. I drank a lot of milk and water because I didn't like pop.
================================================== ======
Present Perfect:
1). No he viajado un país aparte de los Estados Unidos. He visitado los estados de Illinois, Wisconsin, Missouri, Tennessee, Indiana, y Georgia. No he ido a New England ni al occidental de lost estados Unidos.

1). I haven't traveled to any country outside of the United States. I have visited the states of Illinois, Wisconsin, Missouri, Tennessee, Indiana, and Georgia. I haven't gone to New England nor the west of the United States


That's all I have now.

Thanks in advance

[Rusty]

Originally Posted by H0la456

1). Cuando (<=accent? (no)) mi bisabuelo llegó a Estados Unidos desde (wrong preposition) Croacia y se perdío en el camio a Chicago porque (él) no sabía Inglés. Durante la noche, mi bisabuelo (substitute a pronoun) le preguntó (wrong verb) () (missing something here) un agricultor para ayuda (rearrangement of wording after 'le' will help you out here) y recibió un disparo en el pierna porque él no sabía que el agricultor (another word could be substituted here) le decía a salir.
2). En el verano de quinto grado (this phrasing doesn't make sense outside of English - substitute your age or specify how many years ago this happened), traté () () (missing preposition and verb) una rampa con mi bicicleta y me caí desde my bicicleta (wrong preposition and you can use a pronoun for the other two words) y raspé (use an accidental 'se' construction here) el rodillo y el pie.

Imperfect:
1.) Mi perro era muy pequeño cuando mi familia y yo () recibíamos ella (use a direct object pronoun instead of a subject pronoun - it goes where the empty parentheses are) desde (wrong preposition) un granja en el pueblo de (town name). Originalmente, ella se sentía muy triste cuando () llevabamos desde (wrong preposition) su casa.
2.) Cuando era pequeño, yo jugaba en el parque por muchas horas. Subía muchos árboles en el parque (too repetitive). Yo bebía mucho leche y agua porque no me gustaba (watch agreement) los refrescos()

Present Perfect:
1). No he viajado () un país aparte de los Estados Unidos. He visitado los estados de Illinois, Wisconsin, Missouri, Tennessee, Indiana, y Georgia. No he ido a New England ni al occidental de lost estados Unidos.

Welcome to the forums!

Everything marked in red needs to be changed. Hints are embedded in purple parentheses. Words that are in purple could be replaced with an alternative so you don't repeat yourself so often.

[H0la456]

Originally Posted by Rusty

Welcome to the forums!

Everything marked in red needs to be changed. Hints are embedded in purple parentheses. Words that are in purple could be replaced with an alternative so you don't repeat yourself so often.

Thanks a bunch for the help! I appreciate how you didn't just correct, you explained and left me to also correct it

[Rusty]

Originally Posted by H0la456

Thanks for the help

You're welcome.
You may post your corrected assignment here so we can have another look, if you'd like.

By the way, your first use of 'desde' is OK, but you should not use it in the other places. If you change all occurrences to another preposition, that would be better.

If you have any questions, just ask.

[smn1085]

Originally Posted by Rusty

Welcome to the forums!

Everything marked in red needs to be changed. Hints are embedded in purple parentheses. Words that are in purple could be replaced with an alternative so you don't repeat yourself so often.

"Desde" is correct.

"Desde América hacia Asia" = "From America to Asia".

"Desde que (yo) te conocí" = "Since I met you".

I'm from Spain.

[Rusty]

Originally Posted by smn1085

"Desde" is correct.

"Desde América hacia Asia" = "From America to Asia".

"Desde que (yo) te conocí" = "Since I met you".

Welcome to forums!

I agree that 'desde' should be used as you have stated in the quoted material, but that isn't the incorrect usage I marked for the original poster. Only his first usage was OK.

[AngelicaDeAlquezar]

@smn1085: Es verdad que la palabra "desde" existe y es correcta en español, pero no es correcto el uso que se le dio en este texto, excepto por una oración.