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Revisar mi introduccion?

 

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  #11  
Old October 25, 2008, 11:09 AM
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¡Claro que sí! ¡Que pongas el próximo párrafo del cuento!

to post
=poner un mensaje (easily understood)
=escribir un mensaje (ditto)
=publicar un mensaje (official)
=postear un mensaje (unofficial, but commonly used loan word from English)
=abrir un hilo (open a thread - first post)
=hacer una respuesta (post a response)
=responder al mensaje (ditto)

apostar = to bet (most common use of apostar)
apostar = to post, station (assign someone to a certain area)
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  #12  
Old October 25, 2008, 06:29 PM
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Es un parrafo largo

Este cuento ocurrió cuando mi padre era niño. Él y sus tres hermanos y cuatros hermanas vivían en una casa pequeña en un barrio pobre en San Jacinto. Como eran pobres, no había mucho para divertirse durante el ocico, sino disfrutar el aire libre. A veces, mi padre y mis tíos trataban de atrapar a las tortugas (por supuesto, sin éxito) en el río. A veces, ellos subían los árboles grandes de pacana [pecan trees?] que residían en la frente de la casa. Y a veces, ellos jugaban al fútbol americano en el césped vacío [empty yard or a sandlot?] al lado de la iglesia. Ellos siempre jugaban por toda la tarde, hasta ha puesto el sol [so or too?] bajo que los chicos tenían que regresar a la casa. Fue uno de estos días que por la primera vez apareció el fantasma.

muchas gracias otra vez
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  #13  
Old October 25, 2008, 08:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hombre-Araña View Post
Es un párrafo largo.

Este cuento ocurrió cuando mi padre era niño.
Él y sus tres hermanos y cuatros hermanas vivieron en una casa pequeña en un barrio pobre de San Jacinto. Como eran pobres, no había mucho para divertirse durante el ocico, sino disfrutar del aire libre. A veces, mi padre y mis tíos se esforzaron por atrapar [a]a[/s] las tortugas (por supuesto, sin éxito) en el río. A veces, (ellos) subieron los pacanas grandes que estaban en la frente de la casa. (Y a veces) También, (ellos) jugaron al fútbol americano en el terreno baldío al lado de la iglesia. Ellos siempre jugaban por toda la tarde, hasta que el sol estaba por esconderse y que los chicos tuvieron que regresar a la casa. Fue en uno de estos días que apareció el fantasma por la primera vez.

muchas gracias otra vez
I tried to leave as many original words as possible.
There are many ways to go with this, but I believe my changes convey the message you intended. A native speaker may be able to give other suggestions.
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  #14  
Old October 26, 2008, 07:50 AM
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Por qué usa el pretérito con mucho de los verbos, y no el imperfecto? And I meant "ocio", not "ocico" . También, "esforzarse" quiere decir "to try"? Hay otras palabras que quieren decir "to try"?
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  #15  
Old October 26, 2008, 08:14 AM
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El imperfecto se usa para describir, entre otras cosas, acciones pasadas no cumplidas. Tu padre y tus tíos cumplieron las acciones que corregí.

Tratar e intentar son sinónimos y significan to try. Esforzarse por quiere decir to strive to, y creía que encajaba mejor el cuento.

Last edited by Rusty; October 26, 2008 at 06:57 PM.
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  #16  
Old October 27, 2008, 11:09 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rusty View Post
I tried to leave as many original words as possible.
There are many ways to go with this, but I believe my changes convey the message you intended. A native speaker may be able to give other suggestions.
I have heard the following used by native speakers.......


cuando se mete el sol = when the sun sets


Is that what you mean for: hasta que el sol estaba por esconderse y
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  #17  
Old October 27, 2008, 11:11 AM
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Elaina, the sentence Cuando se pone el sol en la Playa, it's sound as a song of Luis Miguel jijijij, in really when I read your post the first that come to my mind was the song of Luis Miguel.
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  #18  
Old October 27, 2008, 11:52 AM
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In the story, the sun was getting low in the sky (was about to set). I could have said 'el sol estaba por ponerse,' of course, but a story merits a little literary license, so I offered esconderse.
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  #19  
Old October 28, 2008, 08:46 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rusty View Post
In the story, the sun was getting low in the sky (was about to set). I could have said 'el sol estaba por ponerse,' of course, but a story merits a little literary license, so I offered esconderse.

ooohhhhh........

Sorry, I lost my license way back.....

I need to loosen up!!

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