Need help translating English Tex-Mex song to Spanish

[johnnyprofane1]

Hi,

I would appreciate any help translating this English song chorus into colloquial, even slangy Mexican Spanish.

Naturally, we would be very pleased to include a credit on our forthcoming EP.

Here is the chorus in English:

CHORUS
South of the border, where my future lies,
I lost my love, now I need a disguise.
I opened a door that I cannot close.
This highway I chose, let's see where it goes.

Here is my own attempt at translating, based on high school Spanish classes and Google Translate.

CHORUS
Al sur de la frontera, donde mi futuro está,
He perdido mi amor, ahora necesito un disfraz.
Abrí una puerta que no puedo cerrar.
El camino que escogí, vamos a ver a dónde va.

I wasn't able to match the rhyming scheme of the English, and am not sure the translation is even accurate.

We are using "el camino" in many senses: the American light truck model of that name, the way, the path, the journey, the highway (archaic). And the song is informed by St. Teresa d'Avila.

Any help would be much appreciated.

If you are interested here is a YouTube of the demo we've made prior to studio recording: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gj8V3AtWhgs

[poli]

Hi,

I would appreciate any help translating this English song chorus into colloquial, even slangy Mexican Spanish.

Naturally, we would be very pleased to include a credit on our forthcoming EP.

Here is the chorus in English:

CHORUS
South of the border, where my future lies,
I lost my love, now I need a disguise.
I opened a door that I cannot close.
This highway I chose, let's see where it goes.

Here is my own attempt at translating, based on high school Spanish classes and Google Translate.

CHORUS
Al sur de la frontera, donde mi futuro está,
He perdido mi amor, (ahora necesito un disfraz) for the sake of rhyme you may want to change the meaning slightly to ahora sé que mi vida cambiará.
Abrí una puerta que no puedo cerrar ya
El camino que escogí, vamos a ver a (or quien sabe por it may flow better in the song) dónde se va.

I wasn't able to match the rhyming scheme of the English, and am not sure the translation is even accurate.

We are using "el camino" in many senses: the American light truck model of that name, the way, the path, the journey, the highway (archaic). And the song is informed by St. Teresa d'Avila.

Any help would be much appreciated.

If you are interested here is a YouTube of the demo we've made prior to studio recording: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gj8V3AtWhgs
--------
Lyric translation is rarely word for word.

[AngelicaDeAlquezar]

Your translation is fine for standard Spanish.
"Perdí mi amor" would sound more "Mexican".

My poetry capabilities are limited and I don't find much room for "slang" or more colloquial expressions in there. Besides, the stanza already rhymes pretty well.
However, your last verse, in colloquial speech may become: " 'Ora (short of "ahora") a ver pa' (short of "para") dónde va el camino que escogí", which would lose the whole rhythm and rhyme of your original. :thinking:

[johnnyprofane1]

Poli and Angelica,

Thanks! Let me incorporate your suggestions and I'll post. Really helps!

Johnny