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Writing a Postcard
I'm writing a postcard to a Spanish-speaking person, and I would appreciate it if someone would correct the errors and/or suggest better wording to make the words or phrases sound more "native."
I want to say: Hi, I'm having a good time, but yesterday it was so slippery here that when I went outside to pick up the mail for my cousin, I fell on my back because of the snow and thick ice, and I couldn't get up. I had to pull myself up by holding onto the grill of a nearby car. Thank goodness there was a car parked nearby. Needless to say, I am not going to venture out again until the ice melts. I should have been much more careful walking on ice especially since I am not used to such winter weather. I will be home on Saturday. I can't wait to get back to warmer weather. My attempt: Hola, me la estoy pasando bien, pero ayer estaba tan resbaloso aquí que cuando salí fuera a recoger el correo por mi prima, me caí de espaldas debido a la nieve y grueso hielo y no podía levantarme. Tuve que reponerme agarrándome a la rejilla de un carro cercano. Menos mal había un carro estacionado muy cerca. De más está decir que no voy a venturarme fuera otra vez hasta que se derrita el hielo. Debería haber mucho más cuidadoso caminando sobre hielo especialmente ya que no estoy acostumbrado a tal tiempo de invierno. Llegaré a casa el sábado. No puedo esperar hasta volver a un clima más cálido. Thank you in advance for any corrections and/or suggestions. |
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AlecCowan beat me to respond, but here is what I had written.
«me la estoy pasando bien» The model on which this phrasing is based is often «pasarla bien» in Latin America or «pasarlo bien» in Spain, but there are places in Latin America that prefer the latter. So, you'll need to learn which phrasing is normally used where your friend lives. To give the phrase more emphasis, the model changes to «pasársela bien» in Latin America. If you meant to add the emphasis, it was well written, though it might be better to write «me la paso bien». The translation into English would still be "I'm having a good time," but you wouldn't be indicating that that is what you're doing at that very moment (you're actually writing a post card). «estaba tan resbaloso» This should be «estaba tan resbaladizo», unless resbalaso is used colloquially where your friend lives. «salí fuera a recoger el correo por mi prima» It isn't necessary to include 'fuera'. Specifying 'por' could mean that you were getting the mail in her stead (on her behalf). If you were getting the mail that is (destined/intended) for her, use 'para'. «debido a la nieve y grueso hielo» I would write «por culpa de» instead of «debido a», but I suppose both mean about the same thing. You must include a definite article before «grueso hielo». «no podía levantarme» This is correct, but would sound better if you added «solo» or «por mí mismo»[/I], because you go on to explain how you got back on your feet. «Tuve que reponerme agarrándome a la rejilla de un carro cercano. Menos mal había un carro estacionado muy cerca.» I would combine the sentences like so: «Menos mal que había un coche cerca y pude ponerme en pie agarrándome de su rejilla». You could also use 'pararme' instead of «ponerme en pie». «De más está decir que no voy a venturarme fuera otra vez hasta que se derrita el hielo.» The verb should be «aventurarse», but I think it sounds a little awkward. Instead, use a conjugated form of «no volver a salir». «Debería haber mucho más cuidadoso caminando sobre hielo, especialmente ya que no estoy acostumbrado a tal tiempo de invierno.» The opening clause should contain a conjugated form of «tener cuidado» or «ser cuidadoso» (you're missing the verb). I would go on with «al caminar sobre el hielo» (note the definite article). The next clause, after the comma I inserted, would sound better if it started with «sobre todo que» or «debido (a / al hecho de) que». In my opinion, a better ending would be «al clima invernal» (leaving out 'such'). «No puedo esperar hasta volver a un clima más cálido.» Instead of «No puedo esperar hasta», I would opt for something along the lines of «Tengo ganas de», «Estoy deseando», or «Disfrutaré de». |
Thank you for your input, aleCcowaN and Rusty. That is what I needed. I will take your corrections/suggestions and send the postcard today.
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