Puns

Puns
 

post a pun here :)




Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.




if you don't know what a pun is....Puns

Thanks - they are all very punny. :D

Does anyone have any Spanish puns?

It is puny, but I don't remember any, just now.

yTheir common name is "juegos de palabras", but each one has a different name. For instance:

Retruécano: usually the start with "no es lo mismo": no es lo mismo yo lo coloco y ella lo quita que yo loco, loco y ella loquita.

Calambur: the most famous (I think I mentioned it in another thread) is a Quevedo's calambur, of whom it is said that he had bet to tell the Queen that she was lame: entre el clavel y la rosa, su majestad escoja (es-coja). Another one very famous is: si el rey no muere, el reino muere.

Palíndromo which had already been mentioned here, such as: dábale arroz a la zorra el abad.

etc. :)

There are some spanish puns with "no es lo mismo"/it's not the same, but must of them are not for children.
Some "good" examples
No es lo mismo, los dolores de las piernas que las piernas de Dolores.
No es lo mismo, me río en el baño que me baño en el río

Saludos :D

Ah, Irmamar me ha hecho recordar el que decía: "Con los tragos del que suelo llamar yo néctar divino, y aquien otros llaman vino porque que nos vino del cielo..."
O algo así... :)

Jessica.

I'm sorry for this, but I didn't understand your game.

I'm starting to understand some of these! Thanks, y'all! :)

If already you understood the game, then please you explain me please.

No es un juego, Jorge. Son bromas de doble sentido (juegos de palabras).


Here are some more:

As you know, Mahatma Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super-callused, fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

Two atoms were jogging downtown and happened to run into each other as they both rounded the same corner. Brushing each other off after the mishap, the one asks the other, "Are you alright?" "No, I think I lost an electron." "Oh! Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm positive."

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. "How much do I owe?" he asked when he's finished it. The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

A mushroom walks into a club and slides up to the bar. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve mushrooms here." "Why not? I'm a fun guy!"

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. They didn't have much of a ceremony, but the reception was excellent.

Two cannibals are eating a clown that stumbled into their village by mistake. The one says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"

A person interested in winning the grand prize at a joke contest submitted ten puns in hopes that at least one of the puns would make the judges laugh. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

I don't know if this exactly qualifies as a pun, but it is similar in style. A classic Mitch Hedberg line:
"I haven't slept for a week... because that would be too long."

Also one that popped into my head from reading one of Jessica's:
"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies are freakin' annoying."

I'm surprised for long explanation.
But I believe that the term joke in double sense isn't the mine.

Thank you anyhow.

A toothless termite comes into a bar, "is the bar tender here?"

@Rusty: :lol:

@JPablo: Ese último es muy tierno. ;)


-- Estaba lloviendo.
-- ¿A quién estabas tú viendo?


-- ¿Usted, no nada nada?
-- Es que no traje traje, porque me lo guarda el guarda.


-- ¿Usted cómo come?
-- ¿Que cómo como? Como como como.


-- Al fakir lo mordió la víbora.
-- ¿Cobra?
-- No, gratis.


Y éste es de Xavier Villaurrutia (México, 1903-1950):
Y mi voz que madura
y mi voz quemadura
y mi bosque madura
y mi voz quema dura.
-- De Nocturno en que Nada se Oye.

@Angelica: All great! You reminded me of another:

¿A cuánto vuela el pájaro a la quebrada?
No vuela ala quebrada.

Would you always use la víbora for a snake in general? The joke doesn't work if it's more specific.

:lol:! Me tomó mucho tiempo entenderlo pero ahora entiendo :) Tuve usar dos diccionarios. Estos juegos de palabras me ayudan comprender mejor el vocabulario.

@Perikles: There should be a biological difference between a "serpiente" (any snake) and a "víbora" (poisonous ones), but Mexicans tend to use both words interchangeably. "Serpiente" sometimes feels a bit more formal though.

@LibraryLady: :)

@Rusty: Pobre pájaro. :D


Btw... the one with the cannibals and the clown also works in Spanish:
Dos caníbales se comen a un payaso que llegó a su aldea por accidente, y un caníbal le dice al otro: "¿no te sabe como chistoso?".

And I remembered one more:
-- Capitán, se aproximan quince carabelas por babor.
-- ¿Una flota?
-- ¿Cómo una? ¡Todas flotan!

I don't get the Spanish ones....:S