Hilo de insultos / Insults thread

[aleCcowaN]

And another one I've used in lateral thinking workshops (guessing the famous comebacks):

Lady Astor: - "If you were my husband, I'd poison your tea"
Churchill : -"Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it!"

[CrOtALiTo]

Originally Posted by aleCcowaN

And another one I've used in lateral thinking workshops (guessing the famous comebacks):

Lady Astor: - "If you were my husband, I'd poison your tea"
Churchill : -"Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it!"

Hahahahah nice the jokes.

[Sancho Panther]

"His brain is just like Woolworths, everything in it's place - and nothing worth more than sixpence"

Aneurin Bevan (Labour MP) speaking of Neville Chamberlain (1930s Tory Prime Minister).


Notes:-

Woolworths = Forerunner of "Todo por 1€" shops.
Chamberlain = Prime Minister condemned as architect of 'appeasement' of Hitler, but in fact there was no alternative - and I'm a Labour voter!

[aleCcowaN]

Originally Posted by Sancho Panther

Chamberlain = Prime Minister condemned as architect of 'appeasement' of Hitler, but in fact there was no alternative - and I'm a Labour voter!

Did you support Clement Attlee?

[Sancho Panther]

Originally Posted by aleCcowaN

Did you support Clement Attlee?

Cheeky bugger - I was only born in 1944!

[sosia]

¿Que tal están tu mujer y mis hijos?
----------------------------------------------
A - Buenos días
B -eran buenos hasta que apareciste
----------------------------------------------
Saludos

[CrOtALiTo]

Originally Posted by sosia

¿Que tal están tu mujer y mis hijos?
----------------------------------------------
A - Buenos días
B -eran buenos hasta que apareciste
----------------------------------------------
Saludos

The joke was very rudeness for one family that read this post in my house, although in my own view point it's was good.

How are your wife and my children?
Do you know other red jokes?

I don't know if you know about Polo Polo, he makes jokes very funny here in Mexico, inclusive he has a website where you can listen his jokes in online.

[sosia]

Es una pena lo mal que cantas para lo bien que desafinas

Saludos

[Perikles]

Originally Posted by sosia

Es una pena lo mal que cantas para lo bien que desafinas

Saludos

That reminds me of a wonderful insult in the opening lines of The Importance of Being Earnest. Victorian Britain, and a servant may not be rude to a master, but he can be clever, like this one:

Algernon (master) plays piano badly, then speaks to his servant, Lane.

Algernon: Did you hear what I was playing, Lane?
Lane: I didn't think it polite to listen, Sir.

[sosia]

Originally Posted by Perikles

That reminds me of a wonderful insult in the opening lines of The Importance of Being Earnest. Victorian Britain, and a servant may not be rude to a master, but he can be clever, like this one:

Algernon (master) plays piano badly, then speaks to his servant, Lane.

Algernon: Did you hear what I was playing, Lane?
Lane: I didn't think it polite to listen, Sir.

Very good

[poli]

This is a really good song filled with the great insults, brilliant English, sharp irony and humor. It's a duet. It is Desiree who pitches the insults.
http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/alitt...meetmywife.htm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFm_L...292514689CE7E4

[Johndiv23]

So indirectly insulting someone. That's hard. You have to very sarcastic to do this. Like Dr. House.

[aleCcowaN]

Do not argue with []. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

[Sancho Panther]

Originally Posted by aleCcowaN

Do not argue with []. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

Not without his script he won't!

[AngelicaDeAlquezar]

Alguien me citó éste, salido probablemente de alguna novela inglesa del siglo diecinueve:

"Verá usted, señor, las vacas son como usted y como yo... aunque más bien como usted."

[CrOtALiTo]

What is the meaning of your joke?

I can't understand it clarify.

[Luna Azul]

Originally Posted by CrOtALiTo

What is the meaning of your joke?

I can't understand it clarify.

Who are you asking?

[chileno]

Originally Posted by Luna Azul

Who are you asking?

I can't understand it. Please clarify.

I guess that's it.

[Luna Azul]

Originally Posted by chileno

I guess that's it.

[CrOtALiTo]

Originally Posted by Luna Azul

Who are you asking?

What does means her jokes?