Hilo de Chistes / Joke Thread

[Jessica]

...

What do you call a fly with no wings?

...

a walk


...

[Cloudgazer]

Originally Posted by pinosilano

A: nunca he podido decir zapato...
B: ¿cómo no?... lo acabas de decir...
A: no, escúchame...jueves, viernes, zapato y domingo...
B: ¡Plop!

Me gusta mucho éste.

[Perikles]

Children Are Quick
____________________________________

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: Maria.
____________________________________

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

____________________________________________

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
__________________________________

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is.
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's.. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

___________________________________

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher

[irmamar]

¡Son muy buenos!

[Elaina]

"I'm mechanically inclined. I screw up everthing"

[Cloudgazer]

Hilarious stuff!

[pinosilano]

Originally Posted by Jessica

...

What do you call a fly with no wings?

...

a walk


...

[vita32]

Originally Posted by Jessica

...

What do you call a fly with no wings?

...

a walk


...

A grounded fly?


To all recent jokes.......

[CrOtALiTo]

Hello.

Today I have a question for this post.

Although I know this post was made for solely jokes, I don't know what means one word wrote in the post.

I'd like to know.

What does grounded means?

I did a little search in the internet, and only I found that grounded means castigado, I don't know if that fully true.

I will grateful with your prompt answer.

[vita32]

Originally Posted by CrOtALiTo

Hello.

Today I have a question for this post.

Although I know this post was made for solely jokes, I don't know what means one word wrote in the post.

I'd like to know.

What does grounded means?

I did a little search in the internet, and only I found that grounded means castigado, I don't know if that fully true.

I will grateful with your prompt answer.

Hi Crotalito, I'm glad you asked. Yes, "grounded" means punished but this term is also used on airplanes that are not allowed to fly, usually, for maintenance or other safety issues.

[CrOtALiTo]

Originally Posted by vita32

Hi Crotalito, I'm glad you asked. Yes, "grounded" means punished but this term is also used on airplanes that are not allowed to fly, usually, for maintenance or other safety issues.

I got it.

Then I can use that word like a punish over a person or that word only are address for commonly things.

I mean, I could to use that definition when I punish to my children for do something bad in the house.

[pjt33]

Me parece que el sentido original debe de ser "limitado a la tierra" (de un avión), y que la acepción "prohibido de salir" (el castigo a los niños) se derivaría de ése.

[CrOtALiTo]

Then the original phrase does't make sense.
The phrase would be written so.

You are punish today without get out right.

You have forbidden to get out of the house.

Which ones sound more logical for you.

[vita32]

Originally Posted by CrOtALiTo

Then the original phrase does't make sense.
The phrase would be written so.

You are punish today without get out right.

You have forbidden to get out of the house.

Which ones sound more logical for you.

Please look here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grounding_(punishment)

[Cloudgazer]

Originally Posted by CrOtALiTo

Then the original phrase does't make sense.
The phrase would be written so.

You are punish today without get out right.

You have forbidden to get out of the house.

Which ones sound more logical for you.

*You are punish today without get out right.
You are being punished today without permission to leave.
(Mi intento en español: Hoy te castigas sin permiso para salir.)

*You have forbidden to get out of the house.
You have been forbidden to leave the house.
(Mi intento: Se te ha prohibido que salgas de la casa.)

[AngelicaDeAlquezar]

Originally Posted by Cloudgazer

(Mi intento en español: Hoy te castigas sin permiso para salir.)

Hoy estás castigado sin permiso de salir.

[Cloudgazer]

Originally Posted by AngelicaDeAlquezar

Hoy estás castigado sin permiso de salir.

Gracias (por la corrección, no el castigo.)

[vita32]

To get back to the topic of this thread......What is funnier than a grounded fly???

[CrOtALiTo]

Originally Posted by Cloudgazer

*You are punish today without get out right.
You are being punished today without permission to leave.
(Mi intento en español: Hoy te castigas sin permiso para salir.)

*You have forbidden to get out of the house.
You have been forbidden to leave the house.
(Mi intento: Se te ha prohibido que salgas de la casa.)

Thank you for the advices.

I'm punish today, because I can't leave my job.

My boos always is exigent.

That was my other attempt.

[vita32]

Originally Posted by CrOtALiTo

Thank you for the advices.

I'm punish today, because I can't leave my job.
(I'm punished today because I can't leave my job.)
My boos always is exigent.
(My boss is always exigent.)
That was my other attempt.

It sounds like you are required to work overtime. Although it may feel like not being able to leave the job is punishment, but the word "grounded" or punished is not appropriate to use in this context because you have not done anything wrong for which your boss may be punishing/grounding you. You can say: I feel like I'm being punished/grounded today because I can't leave my job.